I tell my students that taking a test is not like bingo. You have control over the situation, and you can get the result you want. It’s not a game of chance.
Similarly, when you invite someone to an event, be it a concert, a seminar, or anything that requires someone to think twice, think about giving up something else, you want the result to be a “yes” and not waste your time.
How do you get to a “yes”?
The way you ask is very important. Don’t give excuses to say no. You have to be engaging but not pushy.
Before you ask, think about what the person wants or needs. You may have to show that you know what he or she needs or at least understand it. You may have to identify what it is. How can you make it a win win situation?
For last two house concerts we organized in the Monument House, I thought of exactly that. How do get people to come to a concert in which the performers are not known in the Netherlands? In which the programme is not full of works that are well-known? In which people have plenty of other things to do, such as go on holiday to France and Spain?
Everybody has to eat. This is why it’s common to arrange meetings at lunch time. Provide food, and people will come. How about selling the appeal of a chef and exotic cuisine? Add organic wine tasting?
Maybe people are not saying “yes” to the food, the wine, or the concert. Maybe they simply like you, who gave the invitation. Maybe they just want to be inside a beautiful home, with excellent feng shui. Maybe they said “yes” because they know everybody else who said yes are as interesting as they are.
There are plenty of reasons why people will say “yes” to you.
Consider that it is difficult to refuse a compelling invitation.
Make an offer no one can refuse.